FAQ - Getting Over Your Fear of Failure
A few months ago a friend of mine asked me a question about writing, and it's one that other writers have asked me before, and one I've seen posted on writing sites before. This got me thinking... what are some of the more Frequently Asked Questions by new writers?
Well, I polled new writers and got their most asked questions and then asked my fellow writer's these questions. Below you will find a question and answers from each author. Author's Bios and links to their website/Amazon page etc... will be after all of the answers. Check them out for some awesome reads!
Here is the first of the new author FAQs. Keep on the look out for more in the coming months.
Question 1 - How do you get over your fear of failure and rejection?
Azalea - George Addair once said: “Everything you've ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.” It's hard to keep pushing against that fear but I know that once I overcome it, good things await. That keeps me going.
Tiffanie - I haven’t really. I have low self-esteem as it is so I always have the fear of not being good enough and my work not being good enough. I’ve gotten better at just taking a breath and understanding I can’t please everyone, which helps a little.
Jane - I try to remember that I am not to everyones taste. I read widely and lots of popular books aren’t for me either. So, it takes all kinds of readers.
Kayla - Unfortunately, I haven’t gotten over this yet. I’m not sure any author ever REALLY gets over it. Moving past it to actually accomplish anything is a bit different. I just remind myself that even if something is rejected, I still WROTE it. I FINISHED it, and now I just have to go back and edit, and tear apart, and edit again, until it’s good enough.
Mart - I never have. I struggle with it every time I write something or send something out. I get a lot of rejections. A. Lot. I feel almost gun-shy. It’s I so easy to just stop, keep everything in my hard drive, you know, safe. But then I remember that everyone feels that way, and I give myself about 10 minutes to be depressed, and then I close up that rejection letter and I try to move on.
Everybody is scared. It’s just like adulthood.
Ravyn - I never fully get over it. I always have that question in my mind, wondering what I did wrong, hating that I didn’t work harder or do something different. A lot of times I just try to make manageable goals. Rather than thinking I need to sell a million copies of something, I consider little goals. I must finish writing it, I must find beta readers, and if they dislike it, I remind myself that this is why I got beta readers. I then assure I got beta readers in my genre and I make changes they suggest. I join new groups of experts in the areas they disliked. If they feel like, for instance, I didn’t write a club scene correctly. That becomes a challenge and I visit clubs, I join groups for people who adore going clubbing, I find new friends who adore going clubbing and I ask their help and I fully listen. The more I listen, the better the story gets and I then get some people invested in its success—because they helped write it. This lets my beta readers see I am listening, gets me new knowledge and new friends, and assures I’ll slowly deal with less failure and rejection.
Sidney - I think my answer to this question will come off as a bit selfish, but the truth is that I write for myself, never for others or an audience. This is one of the great freedoms of being a self-published author!
So my sense of failure isn't based around: will readers like it/buy it? Will this sell me _ number of books? Will I get bad reviews online?
Instead, I sit back and ask myself: do I like this? Am I proud of this? Am I proud enough to put it out in the world and stand behind it 100% no matter what?
If the answer is yes, then I'm okay moving forward and sharing it with the rest of the world. If my answer is no, I go back to the drawing board or I find out what I'm displeased with and work to make it pleasing.
In a nutshell I guess my advice is this: you define your success or failure. Never let anyone else do that for you.
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Azalea - I'm Azalea Fox, a contemporary and erotic romance author. I love reading and writing about regular women and the awesome men who absolutely dote on them. Growing up, my favorite author was Nora Roberts and I used to spend my days indoors reading her books. Now, my favorite things are days by the sea and hanging out with my husband and daughter. When I'm not writing, I'm doing art, reading, or watching movies.
Tiffanie - Tiffanie lives in Michigan. She has her degree in Mental Health, specializing in Child Development and a minor in Early Childhood Education. She puts her degrees to work in her young adult and new adult fantasy writings. Though she has been known to venture off into other genres from time to time, she has been published in the anthology Out of the Green and is currently working on the first novel in her new series, Bound in Blood and Shadows. The first novel, Double-Edged War, was published earlier this year.
Find her at her Website
Jane - Jane has been obsessed with all things books since 2nd grade. She lives in Ohio with her twin daughters.
Kayla - I write under two pen names. The first, Kaylie Lanshaw, is a collaboration between myself and another author (Tiffanie Shaw). We are currently writing a New Adult Post-Collapse series set in the year 2044, after a civil war has left the United States of America floundering. Drowning in debt, the country resorts to selling off states to revive the economy. When one of these states is bought by the King of the previously-hidden Vampires, the nation is left uncertain. It comes down to the Prince of the Vampires and a foster kid named Kaelin to prove that inter-species peace is possible. I also write under the pen name Kady Ellis, though these books are still in progress. The first book, which will be out hopefully by the end of 2019, is titled En Pointe, and is a M/M romantic suspense.
Mart - Martha J Allard is a writer of contemporary & dark fantasy. Her short fiction has appeared in magazines like "Talebones" and "Not One of Us." Her story "Dust" won an honorable mention in "Year's Best Science Fiction," 19th edition, edited by Gardener Dozois and her story, "Phase" was nominated for a British Science Fiction Award. Her nonfiction has appeared in Lend the Eye a Terrible Aspect and Deaths Garden. Her novel, Black Light, is a tale of love, sacrifice, and rock & roll in the 1980's. Martha is a life-long resident of Flint where she found magic between the cracks of broken concrete. She joined Flint Area Writers at the age of sixteen, and credits the group with teaching her how to write.
Ravyn - Ravyn Crescent is a survivor; living in a desert and dreaming of a better world. She lived through physical, mental, and sexual abuse and spent years focusing on helping others escape similar situations before realizing that constantly reliving those traumatic moments were tearing her down. She writes paranormal fiction, fantasy, and spends far too much time writing and researching about serial killers. In her spare time, she makes pet collars and works to educate people about pet nutrition, in whatever time she has left she does freelance editing. She has her own company, Crescent Canines.
Find her on Facebook.
Sidney - Sidney Reetz: “That red-headed Devil woman.” Born and residing in Phoenix, Arizona, the caffeine dependent life form known as Sidney started writing in the fourth grade for her own enjoyment. The stories penned back then were during her high fantasy period and involved a lot of dragons, elves and magic. She was ten years old. Needless to say, they were horrible and will never see the light of day – but were fun to write and taught her a lot about discipline. In elementary school she entered the ‘short story’ competition and baffled the organizers when she dropped off a 150-some-odd page manuscript. They must have liked it; she won second place.When not transcribing the Devil’s words, Sidney is an avid crafter and all around nerd. She likes listening to true crime podcast and making themed playlist far too much.